As parents, many of us know the challenges that come with introducing new foods or family meals to our children. After standing over the stove for 45 minutes or more, it can be tough to be met with the “yucks” and “I don’t eat that!” However, in our household, we’ve embraced an approach to food that focuses on curiosity, exploration and reframing negative talk. This evening, our dinner table became a stage for one of those delightful moments when our child, faced with the unfamiliar, discovered the joy of learning about food.
On this particular night, beans made their appearance on our daughter’s plate alongside her familiar foods and dessert. Beans were placed there as a ‘learning food’ for her and, as expected, the immediate reaction was, “I don’t eat beans!” No problem. We acknowledged that she was still learning about beans and moved on.
Instead of pressuring, encouraging her to try it, or negotiating beans before dessert, we decided to turn this moment into an opportunity for exploration. I took one of the beans and opened it up to reveal the tiny peas inside. “Look, these look like peas inside. I can count 4,” I shared with a sense of excitement. My husband followed my lead and, although already having finished his portion of beans, playfully commented, “Oh no, I’ve already eaten mine. I wonder if I would’ve eaten 4.” Our younger son chimed in, “I found 4 in mine too!
With no comments about eating or pressure, our daughter began to show interest. “I can’t open mine. How do you open them?” she asked. I explained, “See that line down the middle? Run your fingernail along there and it should open.” “Can you help me?” she requested. I gladly slid my nail down the bean, handed it back, and said, “Ohhh, I wonder if there are more than 4?!” As the family started counting the beans in their respective pods, our daughter eagerly reached for the next bean, exclaiming, “I wonder how many are in here?!” After successfully opening it, she proudly announced, “I got it! Look, there are five!” I playfully responded, “Five! I think that’s the winner so far.” The magic happened when, without any comments or reactions from the rest of the family, our daughter decided to taste one of the small beans. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed more beans making their way into her mouth. No cheers or applause.
Will beans now be considered a ‘safe food’ for our daughter? Probably not just yet. However, the beauty of this approach lies in fostering a genuine curiosity about food. Will she likely want to open and count the beans inside the next time they are served? You bet! This experience and many more just like it have taught us that creating a positive, pressure-free environment around food can lead to small victories and a lifetime of food exploration for our kids.
WRITTEN BY A PARENT + THERAPY AT HOME THERAPIST
